Chapter Twenty Nine

Dru was relieved. Justin had just gotten out of his final doctors appointment...and he didn't need surgery. Instead, he would have to take a pill three times a day for the rest of the year. It was better than an operation though...and that was all that mattered. Justin was going to be just fine. Now they could both focus on other things...like their less than stable relationship. She wanted more than anything for it to work...for him to be madly in love with her.

Because she was certain that right now, his feelings for her where no where near where they should have been.

"Why are we here?" She inquired.

"I wanna see what's up with my competition." Justin smiled, turning off the engine. He got out of the car.

Dru gazed at the medium sized building a moment, before getting out of the vehicle herself.. "Competition?"

"Yeah," Justin said, "Christina's in there."

"Doing what?"

He chuckled. "Rehearsal."

Her heart skipped a beat. Danny...She hadn't seen him since the party. "With her dancers?" She asked, with hopeful eyes.

"Uh...yeah." Justin said, shooting her a confused look. "Why?"

"No reason." She said quickly.

"Come on." Justin said, taking her by the hand. "We won't stay long...I promise."

She didn't care how long they stayed. The very thought of seeing Danny again was giving her butterflies in her stomach. She wanted to look into his wonderful eyes again. Justin guided her through the doorway. Music was blasting. She could hear people laughing...Christina's voice...They reached the room where all the commotion was taking place.

Then she saw him again. He was so immersed in what he was doing, he didn't see them standing in the doorway...but she knew it was better that way. She still hadn't told Justin about Danny...he couldn't know. He wouldn't get it. Hell, she hadn't even told Jane about Danny. Danny was...her secret.

The music stopped.

"Hey!" Christina squealed, noticing the two of them standing in the doorway. She rushed over and gave Dru a hug. "How are you Dru?"

"Fine." She blushed.

"Hi Christina. I'm fine how're you?" Justin grumbled.

Christina rolled her eyes. "Oh grow up Justin." She laughed. "Hey, actually, you're just the person I need. I've been meaning to ask you..."

Dru tuned out their conversation. She reverted her gaze to Danny. He still hadn't noticed her. She frowned. Maybe he didn't want to notice her. She looked back at Justin. He was in the corner with Christina now. They were both giddy with laughter. She sighed, they were in their own little world now. She might as well have been invisible at the moment. Justin had forgotten her...Christina had forgotten her...Danny didn't...

"Hey you."

She looked toward the voice. Danny had come up from behind her. "Hi." She said, flashing him a relieved smile.

"How've you been?" He asked, wiping the sweat off of his forehead. "Good I hope."

She nodded.

"Good." He glanced over at the hysterical pair. "You think you can get away for a few minutes? Or do you gotta stay with him?"

"Uh..." She looked at Justin. No, he wouldn't notice if she snuck away for just a few minutes. "I can go."

His smile grew. "Good." He took her by the hand and rushed her out of the rehersal room. "It's easier for me to talk to you alone, ya know? It's not so...weird that way."

She understood. "It's fine Danny." He led her down some hallways...up some stairs...around corners. Dru finally found herself inside some sort of recreation room. There were games...pool tables. It was nice...private.

"You thirsty?" He asked.

She shuddered. You want a coke?... No...he wasn't Wade...this was Danny. Danny wasn't going to put something in her soda. "Yes." She got out.

"What's your poison?" He asked, feeding some change to the machine. "Coke...Diet Coke..."

"Coke."

Danny retrieved the beverages and walked back to where she sat. "So," he said, taking a seat himself. "I guess we have a lot of catching up to do Dru."

She nodded. "We do."

"Christina tells me...that you live with Justin."

"Yeah." She half smiled. "He's my boyfriend."

"Boyfriend?" He gave her a confused look. "Gee...I never would have guessed."

She raised and lowered her eyebrows. "It's true."

"How did that come about?" He laughed. "If you don't mind me asking."

"It's sort of complicated." Dru sighed. "We met because I was trying to rob his best friend...and then one thing led to another...and I ended up here."

"And why were you trying to rob..." He began.

"I was living on the street Danny." She wouldn't look at him.

"Oh." He whispered. "I...I...lord, I'll never forgive myself for leaving you behind Dru. Never." He shook his head.

"It wasn't your fault." Dru told him. "Danny...you did what you had to do. I never thought badly of you for that...I was happy that you had gotten out...saved yourself."

"I went back you know." He confessed. "I went back to find you...but there was no one there."

She shrugged. "I don't know what happened to that place, I ran a year after you did."

"I thought you might have been killed." He said, with a shaky voice. "After that day...I lost it. I blamed myself...like it was my fault you were dead. The only thing I could do...was push you and everything that had been my life at the time, out of my mind. That's when I changed my name...and got myself some help. I was lucky Dru...I got taken in by a really great woman. She gave me everything Dru. She got me into a really good school for the performing arts...and for the first time, I had goals...dreams. It made it easier for me to forget...the past, and what had happened to me. That's why I didn't recognize you at the party...and I'm sorry." He squeezed her hand. "I hope you can find it in your heart...to forgive me."

"Of course I can." She whispered, her eyes filled with tears. "We have each other now Danny. It doesn't matter what happened before."

He kissed her cheek. "I'm never gonna leave you behind again Dru."

She smiled. "I know."

"How's your relationship with Justin goin'?" He asked. "He treat you right?"

She didn't know how to answer his question. Her relationship with Justin was complicated...too complicated for anybody to understand. Yes, it would make things easier for everybody if she just gave him a simple, well to do answer. "We have our ups and downs. But...I love him."

"You're too good for a guy like him if you ask me."He smiled, winking at her. "Just let me know if I need to set him straight."

Her? Too good for Justin? She giggled. The idea was insane. "We better get back." She told him. "They're going to be looking for us."

He nodded. "Yeah...I guess."

She got up. "I'm glad we had this little chat Danny."

"Me too." He smiled.

"Bye." She started toward the door.

"Dru."

She looked back at him. "Yes."

He stepped toward her. "I...I should tell you something."

She was a little confused. "What's that?"
He looked at the ground. "I want you to know...that I'm gay." He whispered, meeting her gaze again. "I want you to know, before you find out from somebody else. It's not something I'm proud of Dru...but it's the way I turned out."

"Why aren't you proud of it?" She asked. "Danny...it doesn't matter. There's nothing wrong with being gay. That's you...that's part of you...and it's beautiful."

Tears began to run down his face. "You're sure." He sniffled.

"I've never been more sure about anything." She smiled, wrapping her arms around him. Finally...at last...

She had her Danny back.
*********************
May

Another month had come and gone. A month full of press tours. A month that Justin hadn't been around much. The tour was practically here. Justin was constantly rehersing, going to interviews...photoshoots...radio interviews. Johnny had been right when he said Justin was going to be busy, but she hadn't realized he was going to be this busy. The good side to the story was that she got to see even more of Danny. When Justin would be gone, Jane would stay at the house with her. She was glad. Jane was great to have around all the time, and Dru found she could talk to her about anything...even about Danny. So when Danny would ask her to come out with him, Jane wouldn't ask any questions. The secret was safe with her. No, she wouldn't tell Justin.

She and Danny had gone out many times. Sometimes it was to Christina's rehearsals...sometimes it was to Christina's house(he was living there until the tour started), and sometimes it was shopping or a trip to the beach. She didn't really care where they went, so long as she was with him. He
made her feel special...even though he was gay.

Dru's reading and writing had reached an entirely new level. Justin had continued to help her with that, and when he wasn't around to sit with her and study...she would get somebody else to sit with her. Like Jane, or Danny. Danny was a good teacher, often she would find herself sitting on the beach with him, learning how to sound out words and phrases. He was very educated. He had told her it was thanks to his "Momma Dana"...that she had to meet her one day. Dru couldn't wait until that day came...to meet the woman that had made such a difference in Danny's life.

Her relationship with Justin had improved some. He seemed to genuinely love her now. Everytime he would return from a two week romp around the US he would smother her in kisses. He would act like he couldn't live without her. She was happy. Happy to be loved by him again.

But still, each time he would return from one of his trips she couldn't help but wonder what kind of women he had met and slept with. She wanted to be like them. She wanted to be perfect...better than any woman he could ever meet. She figured, maybe...if she learned to be better than any of the other women...he wouldn't have to sleep with anybody else. But how could she possibly be better than those women?

Sex had to be the answer. That was it. She was going to have to start sleeping with him. If she slept with him...why would he need to find some other woman? He wouldn't. He would be totally hers.

"Who's the leader of the club that's made for you and me?" Justin sang.

"M-I-C-K-E-Y M-O-U-S-E." Dru chimed in as she took the Mickey Mouse scrubber from Justin.

Yes, it was another shower.

"I think...somebody has gotten sexier as time has progressed." Justin informed her, massaging shampoo into his hair. "And her name is Dru."

She blushed. "Justin..."

He kissed her neck. "I love you."

"I love you too." She smiled, but it faded quickly. His hand...it was wandering now. Wandering to parts of her body that he had never touched. She took a small step backward. "Justin...I..."

He kissed her. "You're not comfortable?"

"I don't think so." She whispered.

"You don't think..." he whispered, pulling on her bottom lip with his teeth. "Or you know."

"Umm..."

"It's okay to want to...do other stuff with me D." He said softly, planting soft kisses on her body. "We're together...you know you can trust me." He ran his hand across the scar on her stomach. "I'll never hurt you like that."

"It...somebody burned me." She whispered, pulling his hand away from her mark.

"Burned you?" He kissed her again. "Now...why..." He started, kissing a different spot on her neck with each word he spoke. "Would...somebody...do that?"

"So...so they would know who I belonged to."

"Belonged to?" He reached out and turned off the shower. He peered at her scar again, studying it closely. "Oh." His eyes widened. "It looks like..."

"An E." She muttered. "E for Eddie." She began to tremble. Partially from the chill and partially from the memory.

"Eddie?"

Her bottom lip trembled. "He...ran the sex house."

Justin slid open the shower door and grabbed a towel. "Here." He whispered, wrapping her damp body in the towel. "It's all right Dru." He rubbed her body, trying to make her stop shaking. "I'm sorry I brought it up."

"Don't be." She mumbled, letting him lead her out of the shower. "You had to know sometime."

He ran his fingers through her wet hair. "I'm so proud of you Dru." He smiled.

"Why?"

"For coming so far...so fast." He said, kissing her forehead. "Two months ago...you would have never told me about that scar. Now...you can talk about it...that takes a lot of strength. You can do so much now...you can read a little bit, you can write a little bit and you're gonna master it. The world is yours Dru. You can do anything."

She smiled. "Justin..."

"Shh..." He smiled, silencing her with another kiss. He looked into her eyes. "I think...that you're ready for...other things Dru."

"Other things?" She whispered.

"Yes." He nodded, reaching under her towel. "Stuff like...this."

She felt uneasy. "I...I dunno Justin."

He eased the towel off of her. "Don't you want to feel me Dru? Don't you want to feel our love...like you've never felt it before?" He kissed her neck...her collarbone.

She pulled away from him. Yes, she thought she might have been able to go to the next level with him, but something inside of her was telling her not to. That it wasn't the right thing to do. "I...I don't think I can Justin." She told him, with a sad expression.

"You're afraid." He informed her, running his hands up and down her naked form. "You don't have to be afraid of me Dru. I know you've never...slept with somebody who loves you. I know it's been really painful for you...everytime." He whispered. "But I'll take all the pain away Dru. I'll help you enjoy sex."

Enjoy sex? The idea was crazy. She shook her head.

"Let me go there Dru." He pulled her close to him. "Please."

He sounded like he was totally in love with her. He sounded like he wanted her more than anybody else in the world. She looked into his eyes. Maybe she really was better than the others. "You love me that much Justin?"

He kissed her passionately. "I love you more...than anybody I've ever known." He told her. "You're perfect Dru."

Perfect. She smiled. "You think?"

"I know." He led her back out into the bedroom. "Can I go there Dru? Can I take you there?"

She was on the bed before she finally found her voice again. "I'm...scared."

He eased himself on top of her. "You don't have to be." He whispered, starting to make a trail of kisses down her stomach. "You...tell me...if you...need to...stop."

A million different thoughts raced through her mind as she felt him begin to touch her in places she was afraid to think about. She was still afraid...but at the same time didn't want him to stop. It was different this time.

She gasped when she felt pressure down below. A million faces rushed through her mind. Evil faces...She closed her eyes...held her breath.

"Dru?" He said, breathlessly. "You alright?"

Her eyes snapped open. It was Justin. Not some dirty old man. It was Justin...Justin that loved her. Not some man who treated her like a piece of garbage. "I'm fine." She got out.

He kissed her on the mouth. "You sure? I'll stop if you want."

"No," she said. "I...I want you to Justin."

He reached out and turned the light off. "I'm a take you places...places you've never been." He sang.

She felt him settle on top of her again. "What's that song?" She asked.

"You like it?" He snickered. "I just wrote it now. I'll call it...Dru's song."

She giggled.

"You're perfect." He whispered.

She let him take her away. It was beautiful. The most beautiful thing she had ever experienced. So gentle...so full of love...It was over all too soon. He was lying next to her now...his warm breath blowing in her ear.

But, even though she felt more loved right now than she ever had before, she couldn't seem to tune out the little voice in the back of her mind. He doesn't care... It said. He's doesn't really care about you...he's just curious...he'll tire of you soon...

"I love you Justin." She told him, expecting him not to return her words...expecting him to get up and leave. She was shocked when she felt him tighten his embrace around her.

"I love you girl."
*****************************
A week ago, Dru had been happy. A week ago, she had been wrapped up in Justin's arms, more in love than she ever thought she could be. This morning she found herself crying into her bowl of cereal. He was gone again...back to New York for more tour promotion...he had been gone for three days. She had wanted to go, but Justin had said no. He had told her that dragging her around with him, was bad for his image. That right now, he couldn't be seen with her. She understood...of course she did...

Who was she kidding?

Sleeping with Justin was supposed to have worked...it was supposed to have made him fall desperately in love with her...but it hadn't. That night had been amazing...and so had the following night...and the night after that. But she had soon realized that having sex with him hadn't changed his attitude toward her. He was still the same. He was still seeing Nadia. She knew...because Justin had told her. Not that she was upset about it...seeing other people was the thing to do. But Dru had been hoping that sleeping with him would have taken care of his reasons for wanting to see other women. Her plan had failed. Justin didn't care if she was having sex with him. It still didn't make her as exciting, or as sexy as Nadia was. She could never compare to a woman like that.

No, she still wasn't good enough. She would never be good enough.

But she still loved him...more than anything

Dru knew Justin cared about her. Yes, he cared about her alot...but he didn't love her. At least...not as much as she loved him. It was starting to take it's toll on her. She felt herself slipping again. Squeezing her eyes shut, she silently begged herself to hang on. She had to be strong...Justin needed a strong girl. Yes...a strong girl...a smart girl.

She would make herself better. She would work herself to the bone to be better for him. He was all she had. He was the only one who wanted to love her. She just wished she knew what she could do to be better for him. What did Justin want from her? What did she have to do to make him ignore every other woman? It was all she could think about.

She dried her tears. Her cereal was soggy. She scrunched up her nose and rose from the table, taking her bowl to the sink. Then the phone started to ring...

Usually Jane answered the phone...but she wasn't at the house. She was away on business. Justin had left her to fend for herself. He had told her he had faith in her. That she was strong now...independent. She had agreed with him.

The truth was, the idea of being in the house alone had scared the hell out of her. But, she would have never admitted that to him though.

Justin needed a strong girl...

The phone wouldn't stop ringing. Maybe...it was Justin. She picked it up. "H-hello?"

"Dru."

She half smiled. "Hi Danny."

"Whatcha doin?"

"Uh..." She glanced at the bowl she had put in the sink. "I was eatin'."

He chuckled. "A bunch of us are goin to the beach. You down?"

Her eyes widened. Justin had told her not to go out on her own. But...it wasn't really on her own. She would be with Danny...and Christina. She would be fine. She would go. She hadn't seen Danny in awhile...she missed him. "Okay." She said softly.

"Cool...I'll be by in a bit." He paused for a moment. "You feel okay Dru?"

"Y-yeah," she stuttered. "Why?"

"I dunno. You just sound sad."

"I'm not sad," she lied.

"I don't believe you."

She felt herself blush. She was amazed how he could tell her emotional state, just by having a phone conversation with her. "We can talk about it...later."

"Alright." He whispered. "I'll see you soon."

She hung up. Yes, she would talk about it...as soon as she made up a story that he would believe. Nobody needed to know about her problems with Justin. It was her problem...it was her fault that Justin had fallen out of love with her in the first place. She was lucky she was getting a second chance with him.

She started to cry again...but this time...she didn't know why.