Chapter Twenty Six

(Four days later)

"I can't do this."

"Yes you can. There's nothing to it....you don't need to worry D." Justin said, giving his girlfriend a reassuring pat on the knee. "If anybody should be worried about how this is going to turn out, it should be me...and I'm not worried. So there's no reason you should be."

"But...I don't know anything about being in a music video Justin." She whined. "Why can't you just hire a professional?"

Justin veered off onto a private road. "Because," he whispered. "A professional would leak my plan out to the press." He smiled. "You know that D."

She nodded. She understood his reasoning, but that didn't mean she felt any more positive about what she was about to do. Today was the filming of Justin's new music video for the song 'Cry Me A River', and he had told her that she was vital to the project. She didn't want to be vital to the project...she wanted to be back at the house, sitting on the couch...eating ice cream. It also didn't help...that Justin had yanked her out of bed at five in the morning to get ready. It was just after six now...and she felt like she was going to pass out.

"I guess we're here." Justin chuckled.

She tore her gaze from the window, and gasped at the sight in front of her. A large house loomed before her eyes, surrounded by half a dozen vans and one large trailer. Dozens of people were milling about. Some looked panicked, but most just looked extremely busy. She trembled.

"Come on." Justin smiled, turning off the engine. He glanced at his watch. "We're late."

Dru didn't budge.

He took off his seatbelt and sighed. "Dru...stop being afraid will ya. Sometimes...you gotta take risks, even if you don't feel good about them. You're not always going to be able to hide in my house." he brushed his lips against hers. "And remember what I told you," he said, caressing her face quickly. "Don't be talkin' about what happened with Wade to anybody, alright?" He got out of the car, and closed the door, expecting her to follow.

Dru knew it wouldn't have mattered if she had refused just then, because he probably would have had somebody drag her out of the car for him. She reluctantly took her seatbelt off, and got out of the car. By the time she had closed the door, she found that Justin was already surrounded by a half a dozen people. She gawked at the scene before her eyes. Trace was standing to his immediate left, going over some kind of paper with him. Marissa was standing directly behind him, fixing his hair, and putting some sort of powder on his face. Johnny stood to his immediate right, looking at the paper that Trace was reading. There were also three other people standing in front of him that she didn't recognize, but by the looks of them, she was sure they were important. Dru stepped back a few feet, trying to make herself as invisible as possible. She figured, maybe if she stayed quiet long enough...everybody would forget that she was there. The thought made her smile.

"Dru."

She let out a soft groan. Any hopes of being forgotten about were nixed. Trace had stepped away from the group, and was motioning for her to approach him. She swallowed hard. She knew she wasn't Trace's favorite person. She would have given anything to not have to talk to him...but at the same time knew that that was also an impossible dream. Trace was Justin's assistant. There was no getting around him. She cautiously approached him. "Hi."

Trace yawned. "You gotta go get fixed."

Her eyes widened. "Fixed?"

"Fixed...you know...your hair and stuff. C'mon, I'll take you." He said, pulling her away. "You nervous?" he asked her, a hint of playfullness apparent in his tired voice.

Dru gently pulled away from him. "I dunno."

"Justin said you were nervous." He grinned, leading her over to the large trailer. "Don't be." He opened the door and stood to the side so she could go in before him.

The trailer was anything but average. It was more like a small aparment than anything else. "This is nice." She whispered.

Trace chuckled. "It's Justin's. It better be."

Somewhere in the trailer, Dru heard a toilet flush. Several moment's later, a door at the back of the trailer opened and a woman walked out. Of course, she was glamourous, but Dru was more amazed by the big screen television built into the wall. By now, Dru was used to seeing glamourous people...even at this ungodly hour of the morning.

"Kara, this is Dru." Trace informed the woman. "She's the other one."

Kara gawked at Dru. "She doesn't look anything like what she's supposed to. They told me I was getting a model...she ain't no model."

Dru was confused. What were they talking about? What was she supposed to look like?

"Justin said you can make it happen if you try," Trace nodded. "And I'm sure you will...for the kind of money they pay you."

Kara sighed. "I'll do my best...but I can't guarantee anything."

Trace sighed. "Just do your job." He looked at Dru. "You need anything?"

"Uh...I don't think so."

He narrowed his eyes at her. "You sure? You don't want somethin to eat...drink? It's your last chance girl. I'm going to be unreachable after I leave."

Normally she would have eaten something, but right now, her stomach was in knots. She was afraid that if she did decide to take Trace up on his offer, her breakfast would wind up all over Kara. And by the looks of her...she wasn't the nicest person in the world. "I'm sure Trace," she nodded. "But thanks."

He sighed. "All right, I guess I'll see you in an hour or so...." he slid half his body out the door. "And try to relax huh?" He disappeared from the doorway.

The fact that she had been left alone with Kara, a woman that seemed to want nothing to do with her, was making it hard to take Trace's advice. "How are you?" She asked Kara with a small smile, hoping to warm up to her a bit.

Kara didn't smile. "Sit," she demanded, motioning Dru over to a chair that was postioned in front of a mirror.

Dru frowned, and took a seat. She wondered if the woman even knew that she was Justin's girlfriend. Probably not...because if she did, she certainly wouldn't be treating her the way she was. "If you don't mind me asking...what exactly are you supposed to make me look like?" She inquired, boldly.

"You mean you don't know." She grunted, tearing open a small box.

Dru studied the small bottle that Kara pulled out of the box. What was it? "No," she murmured. Of course she didn't know. Justin never told her anything about the business side of things...except what was absolutely necessary.

Kara smiled for the first time that morning, and let out an amused laugh.

Dru noticed that Kara's teeth were perfectly white. Why couldn't her teeth be that white?

"You're the call girl." She nodded.

Dru's bottom lip quivered. "What'd you mean?" She whispered.

Kara scoffed. "Are you that naive?"

"What's naive?"

"Ah ha." Kara said. "Now I know why they hired you. Because you're too stupid to know when you're about to be degraded in front of millions of people. How much are they payin' you? I doubt it's enough."

"Why am I stupid?" Dru asked. "You don't even know me."

Kara began to mix the substance in the bottle with a powdery substance in a separate dish. "I know your type." She snickered.

Dru stood up from the chair. She had had enough. Enough of this week...enough of not being able to sleep because of what Wade had done...enough of Justin and his "requirements". She had had enough. There was no way Kara was going to make her any more stressed out than she already was.

Kara rolled her eyes. "Sit down would you. I have a job to do."

"F *ck you." She seethed. She almost covered her mouth as she spoke the words. She never talked that way...unless she had a reason to. Was this a reason to? Yes. She didn't give Kara another look. She stormed out of the trailer.

The hustle and bustle of the busy set overwhelmed her almost immediately. As she stood there, several people brushed past her, nearly knocking her over in the process. In a way, it reminded her of the city. A chill came over her. She pushed the thought out of her head. Justin...she had to find Justin. Knowing him, the pampered celebrity that he was, she figured he was probably inside the house, away from all the chaos.

Once again, she found herself working her way through the crowd of crew workers, not having any problem blending in. She finally came upon what she thought was the entrance to the extravagant looking house. She yanked the door open, but was stopped before she could take a step further.

"You're supposed to be in make up."

She whirled around. Trace had caught her. He always seemed to be the one to catch her. "I'm not going back." She stated, holding her head high.

He chuckled. "What's the matter?"

"Nothing." She muttered.

"Liar." He took a swig of his coffee.

She was amazed how alike Trace and Justin were. "I'm not lying." She turned on her heel and started pulled the door open again.

Trace grabbed her upper arm, and pulled her away from the door. "Whoa D...you can't go in there. Not now...they're filming. Johnny'll sh *t."

She sighed. "Fine...then you bring me back to the house. I'm done here."

He cocked his head to the side. "Girl...what the hell are you talkin' about?"

"I'm not doing this...I'm not going to be your f *cking call girl."

Trace's lips tightened into a thin line. "Who told you that? " he whispered.

"Oh...did I find out the big secret of the day? Oh dear," she placed a hand on her cheek. "What will you do? Now that I know...there's no way you can get me to humiliate myself." She shook her head vigorously. "You can both go to hell..."

"Dru..." he said softly. "Don't be like this. Tell me why you're angry...obviously somebody told you something. Was it Kara? Because I can take care of her if it was."

"It doesn't matter who told me." She muttered. "The point is...you were going to make me look like a slut to a million people. I've already done the real thing Trace...I'm not about to act it out."

"The real thing..." His voice trailed off. "Dru...are you saying..."

"Yes," she said, not meeting his gaze. "That's me...Dru the whore. Are you happy now?"

"D...I didn't know..." he said softly. "No one knew."

She met his gaze again. "Justin knows."

"Oh."

"Take me home." she whispered, beginning to cry. She didn't care if Trace saw her cry. She had cracked...lost it. But really, who could blame her? Being raped and then being instructed to act as if nothing happened to you when you were in public, would make anybody a little off. But in Dru's case, the effects of the rape were much worse, since she had experienced that situation one too many times before. Wade had put all the pain...all the memories of what she had been through back into her system. All the memories that she thought were finally put behind her. They were as clear as day now.

"It's...it's okay Dru." he said, putting his arm around her. "Don't cry."

She sunk down, and landed on the ground. She curled into a ball and start to cry harder. She cried like a baby.

"Dru. Come on." Trace said. "It's alright."

She barely heard him. All she saw were those men...all she heard were their voices. She screamed. She couldn't stop. She thought she felt somebody start to shake her, begging her to snap out of it...Justin? It didn't matter...

She wasn't there.
********************
"What the hell are you doing to her?"

He still didn't have an answer.

"Is this how you love somebody J? By treating them as a possession? Dammit...she's not like the others! Can't you see that Justin...open you're damn eyes!"

Justin could still hear Trace's voice in the back of his mind, even though it had been eight hours since he had seen him.

He wiped the tears out of his eyes. He thought he had been doing the best thing for her. He had thought that she would be alright. He had thought that Marissa had taken care of anything that had been on Dru's mind, four days earlier. He ran his hand across the top of his head, and down the back of his neck. No...Marissa hadn't taken care of anything. But she couldn't be blamed. He had realized long ago, that Dru was very good at pushing any kind of extreme emotional pain, out of her head. Maybe...that had been his excuse to thinking she would be okay, until his schedule calmed down a bit. He thought Dru would have simply been able to block what Wade had done out of her mind.

He gazed at her. She was still sleeping. She had been for hours now. No, she hadn't blocked Wade out at all. She had just acted like she had, for his sake...to keep his spoiled ass happy.

She loved him. And it wasn't fair that he didn't love her the same way.

He covered his mouth and let out a silent sob. What had he done? What if Dru was now permanently damaged because he had been too blind to take the time to care for her like he should have? He couldn't put the blame for this on anybody but himself. He shouldn't have acted like he cared about her more than anything. Because he didn't. There was somebody else, that came before everybody else that he held dear to him...

Himself.

Dru deserved so much more. She deserved more than what his money could buy for her...she deserved what he knew he just couldn't give her right now. True love.

"I'm hungry."

He looked at her. How long had she been awake? Had she seen him crying? He quickly wiped the tears out of his eyes. "Hey," he croaked. "What do you want? I'll make it."

"Jus'."

"Yeah?"

"I'm sorry Justin. I'm sorry that I ruined your video."

He shook his head sadly. "I'm sorry Justin," was the last thing he wanted to hear her say. "Please don't say that Dru." He couldn't hide his tears from her now. He squeezed her hand. "It's my fault...that all this happened to you. I'm a fuck up."

Her eyes widened. "You're crying."

He nodded.

"Don't cry," she cooed.

"I'm no good for you," he confessed.

She sat up a little. "What?"

"Look at you D...look at what I did to you." he looked into her her eyes. They still hadn't ceased to amaze him, despite the situation. "You...you're great Dru. You're so special...and nice...and loving. Christ...anybody would be able to tell you that I'm no good for you D. I'm a dog. A dog with too much money. I deserve to be alone, at least that way, I can't hurt any more women. Especially not a woman like you Dru."

She remained silent for several moments. "Justin, I love you. I love you no matter what."

"Why!" he exclaimed. "Why do you love me?" he tore his hand from hers and began to pace the room. "Wade...he...he did that horrible thing to you, and all I could do was try to make you forget about it. How...how could you let me do that to you...and still love me? Dru, don't you understand...you shouldn't love me....because I can't love you."

She shook her head, the tears apparent in her eyes. "You can't love me? Justin...why are you saying that...don't say that."

"I can't love you," he whispered. "Because...I don't know what love is."

"Oh," she squeaked out. "So what now?"

He sighed, "I don't know. All I know...is that I shouldn't be in this relationship if all I'm going to do is hurt you. You've been through hell Dru, there's no reason for me to go and make your life worse than it is."

"You don't want to be with me?" She said, not seeming to hear his reasoning about the fact.

He slapped his palm against his thigh. "It's not that I don't want to be with you. I'm just...I don't belong with...somebody like you." He blurted out. He knew how it sounded, but he didn't know how else to make what he was trying to say more clear. He didn't belong with her. He was on a totally different level than she was. It was the truth...his friends had told him that...his mother had told him that. But of course, he hadn't listened.

He never listened.

"Oh." She turned away from him. "Then I'll leave."

He gasped. "No...that's not what I meant. Just...the whole relationship that we have. It has to stop. It's not right."

"I'll leave." She buried herself underneath the blankets.

"D..." he whispered. "Dru...please don't make this harder than it has to be." he crawled onto the bed, not knowing what else to do. "I'm just trying to fix things. That's all."

"You're not fixing things." She responded, her voice slightly muffled by the blanket. "I love you Justin...I love you."

She didn't understand. This was now clear. But really, he shouldn't have expected her to understand. She didn't know.

She poked her head out from under the blanket. "Is it because I won't sleep with you? Because I will alright...I will..."

"Dru...." he let out a sad laugh. "That isn't at all what I'm talking about. This is about you being happy. Dru...I'm not making you happy," he shot her a knowing look. "You know that as well as I do."

"It's just sometimes." She persisted. "I'm happy most of the time, Justin. Really. Please...please don't stop loving me."

He toyed with her hair, and kissed her forehead. "I do love you Dru...and I always will. But right now...we shouldn't be together. It doesn't have to be forever D...just until we both know what we want."

"I'm sorry. I tried to be good for you Justin...I tried so hard..." She cried.

He pulled her close to him. "Come on. Where's my strong Dru huh?" he rocked her back and forth. "I know she's there."

She was crying so hard...Justin thought she might never stop. But there was nothing he could do. He had laid down the law, and he wasn't about to give into her. No, this is the way things had to be. Dru needed to become her own person...she needed to focus on herself for a little while, instead of focusing on him and his needs.

He sucked in a breath as he continued to let Dru cry into his chest.

He never thought he would be able to be so mature.
***********************
One month later...

"What'd ya think?" Justin guzzled down the rest of the water in his bottle. "Dru...come on...help me out here."

"You dance good." She confessed. "What else can I say?"

"Hey Marty," Justin called over his shoulder. "We can go home now...Dru says I can dance."

"It's gonna take alot more than that to get you out of here today Timberlake." Marty laughed. "Get your ass back here."

Justin draped his towel over Dru's head. "Gotta run."

Dru giggled, and pulled the towel off of her head. The music started booming again.

Things had improved since the breakup. Things had improved drastically. Dru was amazed. She had thought that losing her romance with Justin was the worst thing that could ever have happened to her. But as the days passed, she realized how much more relaxed things seemed to be. It was like a breath of fresh air. There was no more lying...there was no more stress. He was Justin now...just Justin. Not Justin the rich guy. Not Justin, the love of her life. Just Justin...plain and simple.

It was great.

He had started to read to her at night, childrens books. The ones his brothers had left behind. He would read the story and then go back and point to each word, and try to teach Dru how to sound it out. It was helping. She could almost read the whole "Little Engine That Could" book. To anybody else, that would have seemed like nothing. But to her, somebody who hadn't been able to spell her name...it was a huge step. She could write now too. She could write alot of things. Her name, Justin's name...Justin's address. Little words and phrases like..."Hello" and "I love you".

She knew the alphabet.

Justin had said she was a genius. That most illiterate people, never learned everything she had learned so quickly.

Dru was proud of herself. She was proud of herself for the first time in her life.

Justin had even taken her to see a shrink. Something that
Dru didn't understand at first, but once she had settled down, and talked to the doctor...she began to realize why Justin had brought her there. Things started to become alot clearer once she started to speak her mind, and let her demons seep out. Things...made sense. No longer did she blame herself for her horrible past. Jane, her shrink...and now her friend...had made her realize that she didn't need to blame herself. That everything wasn't her fault.

For the first time, she was seeing the world through new eyes, and it was all thanks to Justin...

She still wanted to kiss him though. That was the only bad part.

Little baby with the sundress on...

Lookin' so damn right you're wrong...

Wanna make me write my own little song for you...

Justin slapped his ass and shook it in her direction. She laughed out loud.

The music stopped.

"That's not part of the choreography." Marty muttered.

The clan of back up dancers snickered amongst each other.

Justin sighed. "You're right," he looked back at his dancers. "But I think it's a nice touch, don't you?"

Marty laughed. "Yeah, it's a great touch...if you like being laughed off the stage." He looked at Dru. "How do you put up with this clown Dru?"

She smiled, and looked at Justin. "I manage."

"Dru's a survior." Justin smiled, winking at her.

"You gotta be to put up with you." Marty said. "I don't know how I'm gonna survive a summer on the road with you J. I guess Dru will have to lend me some moral support."

She blushed.

"Uh uh." He shook his head. "She's my moral support. Get your own Dru."

Marty laughed. "Somehow I don't think I would be able to find another one," he shook his head. "Do you dance Dru?"

She gasped, and clutched the towel closer to her chest. "Uh..."

"Yeah, Dru...she can dance." Justin smiled, and held his hand out to her. "C'mon."

Take a new step everyday. That's what Jane always said. But her, dance with Justin...with his dancers? She didn't think she could do it, without being laughed at. "That's okay." She nodded. "I'm fine right here."

"Druuu..." Justin whined, staggering over to her. "Come on. Live a little." He grabbed her hand, and pulled her over to the dance floor.

"Nice." Marty smiled. He started up the music.

He waved his dancers back. "Sit this one out...I wanna show Dru."

Her eyes widened. "But Justin..."

"Shh." He grinned. "I wanna show you." He placed his hands on her hips. "This is how the chorus goes."

It was like a chain reaction. Once he started moving, she went with it. He didn't have to stop, he didn't have to show her how to move her feet. It was like a perfect cadence. It was so amazing to dance with him...to feel talented... She never knew she could dance.

The music was over all too soon. She frowned. She wanted to it again. Justin was lucky. He got to do it everyday, and soon, he would be doing it in arenas filled with thousands of people. As she stood there, pondering these thoughts though, she began to realize how eerily silent the room had become. She glanced around her, and felt herself blush. Marty and the rest of Justin's back up dancers were all staring at her, seemingly too amazed to speak.

"Damn," Justin chuckled, wiping the sweat from his forehead. "You never told me...that you could do that Dru."

She sucked in a breath. "I didn't know." She shook her head, still in shock. "I never danced...like that before."

"I think you're in trouble Justin." Marty spoke up. "That girl can dance."

Justin stared at her a moment. He was studying her. She didn't know why.

"Yeah...she can dance." His eyes were gleaming.

When his eyes gleamed like that, she knew, he was getting an idea.

She didn't know if she liked it.

Yes, she would talk to Jane about it.

"Dru's full of surprises," Justin laughed. "That's why I like 'er."

She sat back down.

"Whoa, whoa..." Marty protested. "You can't sit down now Dru."

"Why?" She questioned.

"I wanna see you dance with everybody else. Justin...the Rock Your Body routine," he smiled. "You know the part I mean."

Justin was beaming. "Hell yeah."

Dru smiled, but couldn't help but notice the odd stare one of Justin's dancers was giving her. It was almost...a hateful stare. "I don't..."

"Don't you even." Justin refused, pulling her back to her feet. "I gotta see this."

The music started.

She couldn't stop now. Something inside of her was forbidding it. It was like some sort of alarm had gone off inside her, telling her it was time to do this. Like she was born to do it...she didn't understand.

But as she felt the music pumping through her veins, she realized how much she loved it, and that she never wanted to stop.